everything in our society today is childcentric. they are to be treated as precious little miracles of wonder who can do no wrong, but ive grown sick and tired of parents trying to be best friends instead of parenting, fed up with the constant stream of ads where kids are always portrayed as wonderful and inspirational, the over indulgence at christmas, the ceaseless procession of gifts at birthday parties where one is expected to buy and receive countless gifts, baby 'showers' and on and on..the snobby 'look at me and my wonderful child' attitude of new parents with their designer £600 prams and branded clothing, parents blocking up streets and dumping their cars in front of people drives near schools, parking their huge unweildy 4x4 kiddy killers and scowling or finger wagging if you trundle past on your roadbike whilst they stop the traffic performing a 28 point turn, the nits, the cosseting, the illogical fear of allowing them to play..then theres the kids themselves...mostly ugly spoilt screaming brats who demand everything as a right and who are generally foul mannered (particularly behind their parents backs), damaging and wrecking everything, valuing nothing and being force fed TV drivel such as 'my super sweet 16' and such like crap... ive never had kids, and at 42 and single my time has probably passed, and ive greeted that prospect with..indifference...and the thought that i'll probably meet a woman whose already got kids, an ex and having to eat sh1t for the rest of my life doesnt exactly appeal...dont get me wrong, i love my niece and nephews but after a day ive had enough...teaching guitar in schools has only galvanised my thoughts and sometimes i just want to clip them around the ear, but these days, to discipline a child is one step away from being jimmy savile.... the fact is, not all kids are cute and wonderful or gorgeous and talented....yours are of course dear parent...kids are labelled 'gifted and talented' simply because theyve attained a level of acheivement that is 'excellent' because the bar is set soooo low..no kid can fail at anything, they are all stars....on the school reports that im supposed to write there isnt even a box to tick for 'average', 'below average', or 'fail'...no no no..thats child abuse....instead ive got crap like 'excellent', or 'working towards'.....this means that the kids actually grow up with a distorted view of the world and with inflated ideas of their own self importance and then experience crushing lows and cannot get a grip on the realities of life...the way they are sexualised and sexualise themselves because no one dare say no..the bullshit ccelebrity culture that has grown out of this nonsense as a consequence where mediocrity is now celebrity and most are under the delusion that they are unique and will become famous for....well..just be famous...true excellence or talent is misunderstood or ignored. it is socially unacceptable for a parent to be anything less than cloyingly proud and supportive of their offspring and to criticise or not give them 'everything that we couldnt have' is to be a monster or somehow suspicious....also when the kid scribbled permanent pen over everything or some such its supposed to be endearing and theyre 'little devils'..how sweet...personally i dread meeting someone with kids and being the one to have to make all of the compromises all of the time forever....no thanks... and..breathe.. kids..by and large i bloody hate em and i hate the way we have handed responsibility and decision making over to them...they are not adults, they are children...a teenager is a child legally until the age of 18, but no...they are 'children and young people'..councils all have a 'children and young peoples service', a kid cant have a cold without having to go the doctors (driven there by mum of course)etc etc...im fkn sick of it.
NOT Gary Glitter, Jimmy Saville and quite a few other celebs and a few of our upper crust, upper classes! They love em!
i only have 2 mates that spring to mind who actually still live with their kids, the rest are weekend dads or live with partners who have kids...which is always a source of conflict...when i ring one of my buds (who has 2 of his own that live with mum) all you can hear in the background is his partners kids screaming and arguing..literally every time..when i retreat back into my single mans cave it is so quiet for the 1st 30minutes that its unnerving...i just cant imagine living in the constant chaos, my house not being my own, having no room in the house for anything, not having a pot to piss in or a minute to myself..sure id love the father son/daughter moments and im certain that they are magical...ive had some wonderful times with my brothers boys (well, until they got to be about 9 and lost complete interest and having to be told by their mum to come in and say hello to me)..but hey, thats kids right? never mind the endless torment and worry that i constantly see and hear..i think...why fkn bother putting yourself through all that crap..isnt life a one sided battle as it is?
whilst I agree with a lot of what you say, in a simplistic defence i'm sure I don't have to point out that a lot of them just don't know any better and it's all down to the teething problems that go hand in hand in making an adult? Also depending how life pans out kids can be a priceless investment for their parents later on in life. It's so easy to get stuck in your ways if you've never had kids yourself - speaking for myself now.
im sure youre 100% correct..but only if based on the assumption that its something you actually feel motivated to do....some people have achieved great things in their lives...sport, politics, the arts, whatever, but those achievements have been made by an overwhelming desire in the first place...often (not always) theyve made those achievements because they didnt have children or had huge support that allowed them to use their talents...personally i think that many people 'end up' being parents and make the best fist of it, and find that it was great, but they never knew what the alternative would have been. either way, if i had kids of course i would be like 99.9% and think they were wonderful...natures kind like that..a bit like finding older women attractive as i get older...a pleasant relief... ive had a few heart to hearts with dads over the years and several have said to me that although its been great on balance, but they wouldnt bother if they had their time around...also most blokes ive spoken would never re-marry but thats another issue...probably motivated by the fact that they lost everything theyd ever worked for... i still cant stand kids though...always ruins a nice social evening...until they fekk off to bed.
Funky....just let my lad read your post, he's 28 years old. I said I think you are bang on n his reply to me was.....and who's going to wipe your arse Dad when you cant get to it...nuff said...lol
you should have re-arranged my quote like others do, as I did word it carefully and correctly but if I understand correctly I guess some parents would get a good feeling of being useful if they could help their 'kids' later in life even if tinged with sadness possibly (and the best ones always would/will of course). It's very much the reverse for me though (as it should be) but it feels like it's taken many years of my age.
As a parent to 3 kids (all grown up) and step dad to 1, I've read this with some interest. If I could go back there are some things I would definitely change. My son was never really any trouble, but then I didn't let him, he knew right from wrong from an early age, and although like all kids he tried to push the boundaries, he was quickly reminded who was boss. His sisters however were a bloody nightmare, their mother Molly coddled them and in her eyes they could do no wrong, one has grown up and settled down the other is still causing aggro. She is " sofa surfing " as she was advised not to return to her council flat mainly because she can't keep her gob shut and has p@@@@d off so many people. In my opinion we have become too lax at discipline, kids have no respect for authority, and the authorities can't punish them. We can't go back to Victorian days, but I was born in the 60's, and there was discipline in schools, we were respectful to the teachers, and woe betide you if the local bobby had to have a word with your parents over something you'd done!
Funky for Education Minister! I'm 43 now and Mrs CJ and I are both SO happy that we chose not to have children. We consider ourselves to be absolutely blessed by not having any! The argument for having kids for assistance later in life is absolutely tragic IMHO.
