Doorbell rings, and it's nuisances peddling guff - Mormons, Jehovah's Witnesses, etc - so there is the problem of how to deal with them. Shutting the door in their face is the simplest, although telling them to fuck off is more satisfying. Perhaps a more subtle approach might be more constructive. Here are a few suggestions: 1. Ask for their home address. When they ask why, say you intend to visit them unannounced so you can tell their children some good news about Satanism. 2. Quote a Bible verse (Isaiah chapter 45 verse 7) at them - it's the one which specifies that God created evil - and ask them whether they favour God's action in that regard, or oppose it. 3. Invite them inside, mentioning that you are gay, you really fancy them, and you promise to show them a good time. 4. Tell them about your business selling double-glazing and loft insulation, and ask them not to leave so you can persuade them to become customers. Any better ones?
My mate always used to say "Oi vey! That's no vey to talk to a good jewish boy like me!" - that usually scared them off...
Can I hand them the phone so they can have a chat with the person telling me I have a valid PPI claim ?
Eff off with the door slammed in their face does work,at least I can get to what I was doing before I got disturbed!
when you get the "can i talk to you about god",.....i normally respond with the " can i talk to you about my cock".....after all we want to share our fascination with eackh other....
funnily enough i had the jehovas in at work the other day, i told them i was £39 an hour plus vat, they left.
An old friend of mine, Hugh Carlisle QC, told me he used to inform nuisance callers that as leading counsel he was available for consultations at £450 per hour, that they were now on charge, and that they should feel free to take up as much of his time as they wished; his chambers clerk would bill them in due course.
No thank you, with a smile and a polite and gentle closure of the door, seems neighbourly ( oh, is that a naughty word? -by neighbourly I mean polite and friendly to a person who is near to me) , not snide, and reasonable behaviour in an increasingly arrogant and aggressive society, and as Bradders say, occasionally pompous. I don't want them to call, but if they do,and it's very infrequent, then polite human interaction seems the order of the day. Seems to work for me.
I once kept them at the door for an hour and a half, they gave their excuses, left and have never been back. I found it strangely satisfying, they didn't get their quota in that day
its great when you get the female ones usually one older and a young lass its funny watching them as you comment on how nice there arses look and do they fancy a threesome :Angelic:
450 an hour bloody hell, i knew i should of tryd harder at school.cant say for the other cults but the jehovas that come in to my place some customers some not, are pretty persistent they prey on the weak and infirm installing paranoia. although i wouldn't recommend whipping out yer John Tomas, giving them a slice of your own does no harm. pretty dumb attempting to convert a Q.C tho, are they not already whiter than white.:Angelic:
As the great dame Maggie Smith once said "religon is like a penis. It's perfectly accteptable to have one and to take pride in it. I just don't want it waved in my face thank-you very much".
JW's are an interesting bunch because God has already chosen the 140 that are going to be saved when he destroyed the world because we havent repented and sorted our ways. So we are all umsavable anyway
wonder what they would do if you let them in and then locked all ten bolts on the door and say to yourself .oooh we have company bet they would want to leave pretty sharp then .....hah aha hah
I bought an Advent Calendar off some Jehovah's Witnesses last year. When I opened the first door, there were two of them waiting to speak to me.
