My wife ran off with the milkman this morning. Watching them drive away on his float was the worst three hours of my life!
A sharp decline in the number of mating owls has been blamed on the exceptionally wet winter. I guess it’s too wet to woo.
A Police Community Support Officer was arrested earlier this week after a video of him having a wank whilst sat on a London park bench went viral. The Metropolitan Police said he came quietly....
A priest, a vicar, and a rabbit entered a clinic to donate blood. The nurse asked the rabbit, "What's your blood type?" "I'm probably a Type O," said the rabbit.
I was at a sex education class and the female teacher said, "Anyone who wants to know how deep a woman's vagina is, please put your hand up." "And that your honour is why I plead not guilty to the molestation charge against me!"
I brought a girl back to my house, took her up to my bedroom and said, "This is where the magic happens babe." She said, "Oh really? I'm getting excited now." So I said, "Yes. Pick a card!"
