When SWMBO asked whether I would pay for her to have a boob job to make them bigger I just told her to take some toilet paper and for her to rub it between her breasts and that would make them bigger. When she asked how that was going to make her breasts bigger I just told her that it'd worked for her arse
I went on Dragons Den with my invention, a machine that makes closet homosexuals admit they are gay. After giving a demonstration, Deborah Meaden said, "I'd like to declare I'm out." "See, that proves it works," I told them
Ladies, don’t you hate it when men hit on you aggressively? Turn them away with these hairy leg stockings:
