At least you've managed to hang onto one of those three Butch......not a bad ratio I suppose! :biggrin:
I love bikes and my other half puts up with them. I passed my test and he followed. He bought a bike and we go out together sometimes, but it is not a passion for him. He does it because I like it, and he wants to be with me (awww!). He is happy for me to go out on my own but I often do feel guilty about it so I very rarely spend more than a few hours out on my own. I guess it is all about compromise. He spends time doing what I like, or letting me ride on my own and I spend time with him. I would love to have more time out on the bike, but he is more important to me. I guess that is why we have been together for 26 years and why I only ride 3000 miles a year if I am lucky.
For me, its all a case of balance. I can't ride all the time, but we all need a release. If riding your bike is that release then so be it
Both my wife and son took their bike test on the same day last year and I can remember closing my eyes both times on the swerve test, luckily both passed. The guilt thing of being out on the bike is now a thing of the past as the mrs appears to love her bike (Street Triple) My only problem is the feeling of anxiety following Carol if we are pushing on at all, a feeling I dont get if I am out with mates
Make sure you dont mope either - nothing worse than a mopey bloke I love riding out with the other half but also enjoy being out on my own - I never feel forced to do anything I dont want to but my kids have grown up and I have my independance and can please myself pretty much - all about compromise - some people are never happy relationships are about understanding - neither party should feel the need to be in control
ITGUY , you got the same problem most bike guys got, with ladys who dont share the same passion, feel the same as you, done the same sort of things, bought her a honda 125 enduro ( also enjoy green laning on my yam 450 ) , she passed her CBT ok too and i was looking forward to spending time just me and her on cornwalls finest green lanes, but she just didnt enjoy riding the bike on or off road, was gutted because i was really wanted to have a laugh with her on the lanes, but not angry about it, in honesty she put up with alot from my biking , me spending 3 months me hospital after some old granny t boned me , doctors telling her i aint gonna make it, for her sake just wish i could shake the bike thing, but its been my passion for over 30 years, also really enjoyed going out together on the bike, good memories, but 3 kids stopped that when they where younger, wish i new the answer. i used to go out sunday mornings at 6am july to sept sun out, skys blue, take a blatt down into cornwall, go nuts, have fun , roads with know one on , bliss and still be back before anyone risen in the house at 10 then still have the rest of the day free, in honesty i dont do all the bike stuff i would like to do just to avoid the arguements and keep the peace, relationships are hard work, but most of my bike mates get the same aggro, except the single buggers , funnily enough moaned at me for putting a single seat conversion on my ducati, but she aint been on the back in 6 years, strange breed, but they taste good!
well, split it in 2... the Multi days are for both of us... invested heavily in the best gear so she is comfortable even in bad weather... so the multi is quality "us" time.. no guilt there.. en top, i'm not " got to the pub wit me mates" type so no remarks there either and the superbike are for some trackdays... no guilt either... best of both world i guess...
I have never worried about who I have ridden with in them falling off. The guy I rode with when I past my test and for 3 years we trusted each other and knew how the other rode. He never went beyond my capabilities and always instilled confidence in me to ride on my own. Any chance we got we were out and visited many places a passion we shared. My recent partner after my accident refused to ride and said it was the worst thing he had ever been through and thought I was dead after he thought the bus behind had hit me. He couldn't talk about it after and I refused to ride again. Time heals and riding is in your blood I'm a risk taker in some things and I can't wait to get back out but I will surround myself with positive riders.
Commuting to work is the solution for me. It give me a legitimate reason to use it, both time and cost effective and does not eat into the family time at all. There are bound to be some no so enjoyable days (wet/cold) and the mosnter 1100evo is arguably not most suitable for communting but at leasret I can ride the bike every working day. I don't do track day nor weekend ride out so it's a win-win for me
Double biking time up with other things, use it for an occasional sunny day commute even if it means taking the long route home, or leaving a bit earlier in the morning. Biking is great compared to things like golf, as you can slip it in any time you are going anywhere else with just yourself to take. Its also advisable to snick in a ride in good weather whenever we get it. I've lost count of the number of times its been clear blue skies and sunny all week, only to be grey and cold at the weekend.
I know what you mean Itguy. I commute into London most of the year but on a nice dry weekend I'd love to be able to head out for a ride sometimes. However as you say there is the 'unspoken guilt'. My wife never actually says no, but I still feel guilty and end up not enjoying myself. I've had similar experiences when I've been off to Germany and France on the bike with pals, or going Scuba diving when we are on holiday. I don't really understand my reaction as whenever she goes out for the day/evening I'm completely happy for her and not bothered in the slightest. So why do I feel like this??? My normal solution is to take a day off when she is working and have a day out myself. She used to go on the bike years ago before we had our kids and I'm hoping to tempt her back onto the back of the Multistrada, and have even bought a (wash my mouth out) top box.
Can't say their is much guilt, but i do try to keep it down to a couple of hours if and when i do go out. During the summer especially when the racing is on, i will go out to the parting comment of "you don't expect me to be surprised do you!" and "have fun" Sue used to come everywhere on the bike but since our first child she hasn't been on the back at all 11 years, but i am hoping we will get out together if only for a couple of hours. She knows i like going out on it, and is happy if i am happy!! Can't grumble at all:wink:
At this end, Madam tells me I should get out on the bike a lot more..............I think she is hoping for the insurance to pay out. AL.
