'It's disgusting that people celebrated Thatcher's death at street parties. She was someone's mother!' 'Exactly, mother of an arm dealer son and a racist daughter.'
Margaret Thatcher's funeral is to take place next Wednesday. Apparently a Wednesday has always been the best day to bury bad news.
Q. What's the difference between 'affection' and 'adore'? A. You can't slam your wife's head in affection.
In Britain the Chancellor of the Exchequer has called an emergency budget . . . . He wants a 1p increase across all alcoholic drinks sales in the wake of the death of Margret Thatcher. He expects this could bring in an additional £500 million billion trillion pounds.
I've driven into London from every direction and I've still never seen those signs saying 'Welcome to London, Please Drive Like a Cunt' Seems like I'm the only guy who never sees them.
I thought I'd wake the wife by going down on her this morning, miserable cunt woke up, give me a slap and told me to fuck off. On the positive side it did remind me to get the salmon out of the freezer though.
David Cameron has said that Britain is prepared for nuclear attacks from North Korea. ...........David we weren't even prepared for fucking snow in winter.
My daughter said to me last night "dad, I want to go to a 50 cent concert". I replied "sure here's a dollar, take your sister too".
After Baroness Thatcher's funeral on wednesday, a sixty foot solid steel monument will be erected in her honour. It'll be made from the millions of empty airhorn and silly-string cans the binmen collect on thursday.
Just saw the plans for Margaret Thatcher's grave, it's truly beautiful, but I think it they should make the dancefloor a bit bigger.
David Cameron has just sent his official letter to the Thatcher residence. It starts, “I regret to inform you that due to recent events, you now have too many bedrooms…”
My mate used to have a picture of Maggie Thatcher pinned up on my wall back in the 80s, she was always a great influence for him. In fact if it wasn’t for her, he wouldn’t be the fantastic darts player he is today.
Margaret Thatcher has passed away. My thoughts are with Satan and the denizens of Hell at this most difficult and trying time for them.
The Evil Dead set to make a comeback at the end of this month. Just when we all thought the old hag was finally gone…
The death of Thatcher has come at a bad time for Britain. We still haven’t replaced the fireworks we used at the Olympics yet
David Cameron says we have lost ‘a great leader, a great Prime Minister and a great Briton’. Who did Thatcher take with her?
