My friend’s ex-wife was deaf and she left him for a deaf friend. To be honest, he should have seen the signs.
"How many fingers?" Asked the paramedic as he leant over my wife. Dirty bastard; she'd only just regained consciousness.
Internet Explorer has finally finished installing on my computer. Just checked the online news: It appears a cruise liner has struck an iceberg somewhere near Canada.....
A couple just got married and on the night of their honeymoon before passionate love, the wife tells the husband, "Please be gentile, I'm still a virgin." The husband being shocked, replied, "How's this possible? You've been married three times before." The wife responds, "Well, my first husband was a gynecologist and all he wanted to do was look at it. My second husband was a psychiatrist and all he wanted to do was talk about it. Finally, my third husband was a stamp collector and all he wanted to do was...oh, do I miss him!"
My wife caught me getting a blow job off her sister. She turned to her and yelled, "How could you do this to me?" I said, "Well, first you'd need a cock...."
I was so ugly as a baby, when my mother breast fed me she used to close her eyes & think of other babies....
