I’m ok, sold the supersport so that’s 3 I’ve owned and only ridden one of them. See what the doctor says tomorrow, it’s the felling of lonely ness that’s the worst.
we are all with you on this mate - you're likely suffering from a form of temporary depression and will likely lose your appetite, sleep pattern and outside interests. In effect, your mental health and wellbeing are compromised by the emotional turmoil of your relationship. There is no quick fix - you've got to stay strong and weather it out - not easy, but you will eventually see daylight and recognise you have the rest of your life to get back on track and find some happiness.
Hang on in there Lumbux, when you talk to the doc they'll probably ask whether you feel suicidal. I believe this the switch that turns on antidepressants or not - hopefully (and it sounds like it) you're not down that route, so doc will probably recommend 'talking therapies ' i.e. counselling. That may take a while, especially nowadays, but at least you'll have taken your first step to getting help. There's always the route of private counselling to speed things up but, of course, it costs...
Try not to go down the anti depressant route if you can. My experience of them made me feel even more lonely I gave them up after 7 weeks I didn’t like how they made me feel. Counselling is a good way I hope you get offered that
I feel for you brother, it's awful and especially given the isolation that we're all going through at the moment. After separating from my now ex-wife in 2017 I found via match.com a lovely lady in June of the following year. She even had a full bike licence, was sassy, tall, slim, easy on the eye and was great company as well as being amazing in bed! Thought I'd really fallen on my feet and found a new life partner. Dropped a bombshell via text end of November last saying that she wanted to be single.... within a week she was in a relationship with a mutual friend. This guy also rides a bike, we'd ridden together... She was asking for all the really top quality biking kit I'd bought her within a few weeks!!! As if I was going to outfit her to ride off into the sunset with her new man! I'm still depressed and not sleeping well as a result of all this, left wondering quite what happened, she never properly explained. After a relationship of a year and half being dumped via text with a lame lie really sucks The one saving grace, this maybe too early for you at this stage, that I found around Christmas time was meetup.com. Has been somewhat messed up, along with everything else by coronavirus but I can very much recommend it to find new friends and activities, both of which will distract you from the sh*t that's going on and also lift your spirits and give you some purpose to every day. Give it a try, look for local groups doing stuff that interests you.
hello, mine are 17,14 and 12. All girls. The 14 year old wants to stay with me, the other two are going to live with mum. The problem is I’m a do’er and can’t stand waiting on things.
As @Keith_P stated Cognitive behavioural therapy is a good route to ask about. You would join a group of people from a wide gamut of society & realize you aren't alone. Obviously this depends on your unstubbing your toe & not doing a funny walk. Or everyone will be staring at you
Can I politely and respectfully say, you are likely to be suffering as others have said, some form of depression which would be totally understandable and again as others again have suggested a chat with a doc and possibly a councillor too. You will feel like it's a death in that your marriage has died and your wife is no longer there. Often the strength of the children behaving like adults can pull you through. Patience as you say is not your strong point but you have 3 lovely kids who want their dad to make it and get through this, not only for themselves but for you too. Kids can be a mighty strong incentive for getting through the worst of times, That doesn't mean you shouldn't grieve in your own way, you should, that's how you let it go. All your girls, I bet it seems only yesterday that they were babies, time flies so fast when they are kids, focus on them and your own health to be there for them, it will help you through it
You could just pull yourself together and man up!There again this isnt the movies.You are going through shit,so it will have an effect.Allow yourself time to be pissed off,angry,upset,sad etc.It may take a good while before any light glimmers in the gloom.It may look grey and desolate,hopeless even.Then one day youll catch yourself smiling in a mirror or giving a pretty girl a Syd James Corrrrr!Just something daft.Doesnt matter what but it will be a reminder that you can live without feeling absolutely shit.Not every waking moment is taken up with "What ifs".It will get better.With some effort on your part.Dont forget those girls need you as well!Keep on keeping on.Good luck.
Thanks all, my children are incredible independent and only the middle one is a daddy’s girl, my oldest is very distant at the moment, I think she is suffering more than she is letting on, the youngest seems fine but I think it will hit her the day they walk out of the door and five become two and a three. The other problem I have is concentrating, I used to love TV but it is not doing anything for me now. This is the first time in my life that I’ve needed people. I was an only child and grew up by myself, used to love being alone but hate the thought of it now, guess I need to get used to that felling again. My wife was 16 when we meet in 1999 and have literally been together ever since. I hope time will be a healer!!
I have to say, you lot on here are great bunch of Cunts. The way you give support to people who are having a hard time is awesome as they would say over here. Lum, I know I cant really help but please reach out to me if you need to chat, I have pretty much done that and got the t-shirt on most interesting decisions if you know what I saying. All the best lad.
This is a grieving process for you and it will take time to come to terms with Lots of things will be going around in your head Keep talking to your girls they need you right now to tell them everything is going to be ok. They will also try to protect you by not upsetting you and they also have to deal with a big change about to hit them. They will try not to upset either of you and may even try to put it all right. There are no answers right now they will take time. Try to live in the moment there here and now and deal with what that gives you. It’s not always a good idea to find someone else just to make you feel better. It’s nothing that you have done wrong. When people make this decision it’s because they want to do something not necessarily because you have done anything You cannot change peoples reactions only your reaction to them. The love of your children is the best tonic the love of another woman will come along in time Don’t try to deal with two relationships at once however tempting it is not to be alone.
My two daughters didn't react well to me upping and leaving, especially the youngest. They were 13 and 15 at the time. Now 16 and 18 and both are fine with the situation, having come to accept it. In fact it only took a couple of months but as they've grown older and matured (they do quickly at that age) I think we're closer than ever. Sign of your state of mind and likely of depression, see your GP as said above. I hear you. Do you have any family you can lean on for some emotional support? My sister was a great help both times around. Trust me it will get better, you will have a fulfilling life and relationships. It's going to take some time though.
I will just leave this here. CALM 0800 58 58 58 Helpline & web chat available 5pm to midnight every day
It sounds like an awful time for you, I hope your toe is ok after the roller accident. But seriously, like others have said, time will help, counselling should help but try to avoid anti depressants. I have an incurable chronic autoimmune condition and dealing with that can be tough. But talking definitely does help and I don't think this has been mentioned yet, but I think exercise is fantastic. We've been doing the Joe Wicks PE classes on YouTube and have really loved them, great for mental health as well as physical health. One other thing is always bang on about is the Wim Hof method - it is a combination of breathing exercises and cold showers. Check out his web site and there are free instructions on YouTube, much better than medication.I Keep strong @Lumbux
